Pumpkins with Faces
by Rally Collins
Summary: Relena listens to Duo for once and ends up following him in one of his schemes. She finds out that pumpkins can smile and shadows can look back. Halloween fic.
1. Acceptable Beggary & Legalized Terrorism

Disclaimer: Bandai, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise own Mobile Suit Gundam Wing. I do not. This is just for your entertainment and my need to brush up on my writing skills.

A/N: This is for the October 2009 contest for The Official FanFiction(dot)net Guild on Gaia Online. The required quote is, "the shadow looked back at me" which will appear in the next chapter as it's only going to be two chapters long. It has somehow molded itself into an R+2 fic that in all probability will end up a 2xR fic. Not my fault! It possessed me! When the hell did I start _liking_ Relena, dammit!

**Pumpkins with Faces**  
- Acceptable Beggary and Legalized Terrorism -

The blindfold wasn't tight enough to be painful, but it was uncomfortable, smelled faintly of ship metal and dark enough to block out any form of light. Seriously, why did I decide to go along with this crazy scheme? Okay, it got me out of the Palace for what was promised to be at least a few hours and it got me away from everything (and everyone) that reminded me of work. Now, don't get me wrong, I love my job and enjoy doing what I can for my people, but sometimes it just gets to be too much, you know. Sometimes I just need to get away. I need to get out and go _somewhere_. It doesn't really matter where. Just _not here_.

So, of course, when one temporary bodyguard by the name of Duo Maxwell asks me if I'd like to "go out" I _might_ have mumbled something along the lines of, "The sooner the better," before my senses returned to scream at me that it was _Duo Maxwell_ who had just asked me that question and did I really want to shoulder the responsibility of accepting his proposal.

He had already gotten me to agree to "trust him" and had whisked me safely out of the Palace without my usual full score of bodyguards before those senses released their full two-cent's worth on me, so when he pulled out the blindfold I really couldn't protest past the expected, "Do you really think that's necessary?"

He just gave me a hard stare with those blue, blue eyes that most would label as cobalt, but I always called sapphire and then threw his arms up in an overdramatic display all the while moaning, "Fi~ine! If you want to ruin the surprise, be my guest!"

That sounded perfectly reasonable to me. "Alright, then. I think I will."

That elicited a response that I wasn't expecting. He laughed so hard he cried. It took a good minute before he calmed down enough to breathe. Slapping me playfully on the arm, he wiped a tear from his cheek and then took a mere moment to finish regaining his composure. "Damn, Lena! That was good!"

I don't think I've ever managed to impress Duo before so, feeling confident, I allowed the hope to rise. "So, no blindfold, then?"

"Cha! Heck no! Turn around and close your eyes." He swiped his finger around in a circle, indicating that he really did want me to turn around. I sighed, purely internally mind you, and then obeyed.

Now, here I was being lead to God-knows-where in the middle of the night. I clung tightly to Duo's left hand and listened carefully to his voice, for while he kept up a constant monologue, he never failed to warn me about a dip in the path, a step up or down or in one case, a particularly large crack in the concrete. After the first few minutes, I didn't even feel unsteady or unsure. I placed one foot in front of the other and trusted in Duo to steer me clear of danger. It was unusually soothing.

He had just finished up some obnoxious story about one of his missions during the war that was so ridiculous I had trouble believing it, when he announced, "Alright now. Big flight of stairs and some of them are a bit crooked, so we're gonna take this one step at a time." I nodded and allowed him to lead me up the first few steps.

It was slow work. The cockeyed angles of the steps were somehow making me slightly dizzy. I just couldn't seem to catch my balance and every time I took a step it felt as if the world were falling away beneath my feet. After the third time that Duo was forced to catch me, I protested. "This is taking forever."

"You're right," he agreed and that only made me feel more of a burden.

"And the next time I fall, it'll probably kill us both."

He gave a small chuckle. "That's a possibility but highly unlikely."

"Maybe you should just let me take off the blindfold. I know I'll be able to move faster if I could see."

He was quiet for a moment before saying, "I've got a better idea." Without any further explanation, his hands snaked around my back and legs and then he lifted me up. As soon as I was off the ground and Duo had a steady hold on me, he was off, sprinting up the stairs, regardless his load and the unevenness of the steps. My arms automatically clenched around his neck.

Now, some might think it romantic to be whisked up into the arms of a dashing young gentleman and carried up toward the clouds, but it wasn't. It very much wasn't. In fact, it was probably very close to being the exact opposite. I was terrified. Duo was bobbing up that poor excuse for a staircase like mountain goat and I didn't for one second believe that we would make it to the top alive. All it took was one misstep and we were doomed. _Doomed._ **Doomed!** **_Doooooomed!_**

Why did that word keep repeating?

"We're he~ere!" my billygoat replied before lowering his load to the ground gently.

I felt around with one foot, firmly planted that one and then allowed my weight to shift fully off of my escort. "So, can I take off the stupid blindfold, _now_?" I had a strong guess about what the answer was going to be, but felt the need to ask anyway.

Duo snickered again, but it wasn't in the least an insulting sort of sound. "Not quite yet."

I resigned myself to try to determine where I was on my own. Knowing the way Duo thought, it might be what he was waiting for. The guy never let a day go by without trying to teach me _something_ or show me something new. The first day he had filled in for my regular bodyguard, he pointed out that I was too stressed and then showed me how to release some of that tension. The second time, he ordered my driver to make a pit-stop on the way to a meeting and bought lunch for the three of us at a local fast food joint.

This was most likely a lesson to show me how to identify my whereabouts if I was ever kidnapped and blindfolded. Any second now, he'd demand to know where we were and I was not going to let him down. Or at least, I'd try to guess close enough to the right spot, so he'd untie the blasted scarf and free my poor, squashed head.

As Duo grabbed my hand again and pulled me forward, I scraped a foot along the ground a bit. By the feel of it, the ground was firmly packed dirt, slightly dusty. A deep inhale gave me the scent of dried leaves and the toasty smell of burning wood. The stairs, the dirt and the trees lead me to only one possibility within walking distance. "Duo, is there any particular reason you brought me to the Old Shrine or was this just a test to see if I could keep my bearings?"

I collided with him as he stopped suddenly. He dropped my hand and heard him turn to face me. "You know where we are?"

I would have rolled my eyes if the gesture would have been appreciated. As it stood, I just snorted. "Uh, yeah. You really didn't make it all that hard to guess."

"Hard to guess?" he repeated. "Oh! No. It's not a test. I'm surprising you."

"Surprising me?" I guess it was my turn to repeat.

"Yup," he replied happily. "You're gonna love this! Just a few more steps, I promise."

He pulled me the last few steps and then pushed me ahead of him, placing his hands on both of my shoulders. "You ready?"

Was I ready? Of course I was ready! "If you don't get this stupid thing off of me, I'll show you what I learned in my last self defense class."

"Right, then! Here we go!"

He unknotted the scarf and let it fall so that it was loosely draped around my neck. I rubbed my eyes and blinked a few times before they adjusted and were able to focus on my surroundings. The path leading up to the shrine building was lined with orange lights. I squinted to get a better view and realized what exactly they were. "Duo, why does that pumpkin have a face?"

"That pumpkin as you call it," he began with humor in his voice, "Is commonly referred to as a Jack-O-Lantern."

"You know, that doesn't explain anything." I was beginning to feel like the whole night would leave me completely puzzled.

"I know." He patted me on the arm and walked up the path. "Let's go."

Since he didn't leave me any choice in the matter, I followed. The bastard still hadn't explained a thing. For some reason, my eyes strayed to the edges of the path and to the Jack-O-Lanterns lining it. Each one was completely different. The eyes were frequently frightening and angry-looking, the mouths were almost always grinning cruelly and all of them had a candle glowing happily away inside of them, but no two were alike. "What are the pumpkins for?"

He gave me a brief glance but continued on his way. "They're called Jack-O-Lanterns."

Now, I rolled my eyes. "Alright, Mr. Smarty Pants! What are the Jack-O-Lanterns for?"

"Originally, I think they were supposed to ward off evil spirits but now they're just a symbol."

"A symbol of what?"

"Halloween," he replied. "It _is_ October thirty-first, you know."

I had heard of Halloween. We covered it briefly in my early religions studies. It was a pagan holiday dating back hundreds of years and from what I could remember, only the people of L2 still celebrated it. I couldn't recall many of the details but I was sure that it was a holiday mostly associated with children. "Isn't that for kids?"

"Depends on what part of Halloween you're focusing on. Trick or Treat is for kids."

"What is Trick or Treat?"

"It's pretty much just acceptable beggary and legalized terrorism. Kids dress up in costumes and run door to door demanding candy. Firm retribution is passed out to those who don't provide."

"Firm retribution?"

"In my neighborhood that usually meant you got your window broken or your cat shaved."

"That doesn't sound like a very nice tradition."

Duo smirked. "One iddy bitty piece of candy got you out of it. I think that's fair."

"Fair, huh?" I found myself smiling back. "And how many of those poor innocent cats did you shave?"

"Oh, you know, ten or fifteen, but who's counting. I broke more windows than that. Not everybody has a cat." He sounded entirely too proud of that for my comfort.

"You're horrible!" I gave his chest a solid slap. "And I _know_ that's now what we're doing tonight because I know that you know that I won't stand for window breaking or cat barbering in my city."

"As much fun as it would be, you're right. I have a much more nefarious scheme in mind but you, young lady, keep distracting me. So, let's go! And no more questions until we get there!"

"But-"

"Ah ah!" He cut me off and then headed off down the path.

Yet again that night, I had no choice but to follow.

At the very top of the hill, in front of the shrine building was a bonfire. Sitting around that bonfire were the only people I had ever considered true friends, including my regular bodyguard, Heero Yuy. The other members of the group were Dorothy Catalonia, Quatre Winner, Trowa Barton and Chang Wufei. Heero was the one that perplexed me the most as he was supposed to be on a short leave of absence due to undisclosed personal reasons.

"What's the meaning of this?" It wasn't anger that prompted that question, just confusion. It wasn't like Heero to shirk his duties.

"We're throwing you a party," replied my escort. "Halloween was just a convenient excuse."

I took a couple of steps toward the fire. "Heero, was this your doing?" With that leave of absence he had the time to set something this elaborate up, though I still wasn't sure how he managed to get _everyone_ to show up.

"No, it wasn't," Heero responded as he stood up and brushed off the back of his jeans. "It was Duo's."

I turned to find Duo beaming at me. "Why?"

His smile grew wider. "Surprise! Have a seat! Grab some cider! It's time for stories 'round the bonfire!" He directed me to an empty spot on a log, placing me directly in between Dorothy and Quatre. They both greeted me enthusiastically; Quatre even slipped in a quick hug, but my eyes stayed fixed on Duo. He'd dropped a mug of hot cider next to me and then retreated to the far side of the fire to sit between Wufei and Heero, but he _still_ hadn't explained a god damn thing!


	2. Jack's Smile

Disclaimer: Bandai, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise own Mobile Suit Gundam Wing. I do not. This is just for your entertainment and my need to brush up on my writing skills.

A/N: This is for the October 2009 contest for The Official Fanfiction(dot)net Guild on Gaia Online. The required quote is, "the shadow looked back at me." I know the ending is a bit late, but "Happy Halloween!" It didn't quite mold into that 2xR that I was predicting last chapter but I hope you enjoy it anyway!

**Pumpkins with Faces**  
- Jack's Smile -

The promised "Stories 'Round the Bonfire" would have been more aptly named "Freakishly Scary Stories in the Near Dark with Only Hellfire to Light Your Way" and I might have been more amused if there was something besides absolutely nothing to my back. I'd like to say that I am _not_ afraid of the dark. Really, I'm not, but for some reason the tales spilling forth from the mouths of my companions were making me think that maybe, just maybe, the shadow--Yes, that shadow, right there, looked back at me. Holy crap! Did it just blink?

Okay, calm down, Relena. No need to get worked up. In fact, it might a good idea to just stop listening all together, right? Right. Now, take a deep breath. And another.

"Relena?" The voice was right next to my ear.

I yelped nearly jumping out of my skin and would have sworn that my heart was trying to claw its way to freedom.

A chorus of chuckles rose up. "Having fun yet, Lena?" That came from the other side of the fire. Now, that I had a moment to calm down, I realized that it must have been Quatre calling my name.

I shook my head and forced my voice to work. "You call this fun?"

"Yup." Duo always did have a warped sense of humor. "Scaring the crap out of your friends is yet another part of the wonderful holiday of Halloween. You guys are enjoying it, right?"

There were heads nodding all around, but to my left, Dorothy spoke up. "Honestly, I didn't find those all _that_ frightening. Perhaps, Miss Relena is just a bit of a... What's that term? Oh, yes. 'Fraidy Cat'."

"Hey," I protested.

"She _was_ the only one screeching when the headless watchman gutted the defenseless school teacher," provided Wufei.

"And she was the only one hiding her eyes when the ghost of the Bloody Contessa appeared in the mirror," added Quatre.

Even the ever quiet Trowa had a contribution to my humiliation. "And did you guys see the way she cringed when the little girl found the severed arm of the ancient mummy in her closet."

"Hey," I tried again, louder this time. "Stop ganging up on me!"

That only served to make them laugh harder and that made me realize that this whole evening was some sort of set up from the start. Alright then, I'd let them have their fun. After all, it wasn't every day that I got to hear this much genuine laughter. It was nice. The fact that all the merriment was at my expense didn't really diminish my own enjoyment all that much.

I took a sip of the now lukewarm cider and took a few seconds to think through my options. I had to determine the best way to get past the predicament that Duo had gotten me into. The whole plan had his scent all over it. The bastard had set me up good and proper, no doubt about that. I couldn't really blame the guy, though. It wasn't like I hadn't put him through a fair share of embarrassment and misery. I had a feeling all those very formal, very elegant diplomatic parties that I had forced him to accompany me on would one day come back to haunt me. Who knew it would be an almost _literal_ haunting?

Whining wasn't going to get them to end their teasing, neither was ignoring them. Anyone who'd ever been bullied in their lives knew that the old advice about ignoring the bully _never_ ever discouraged them. Really, the only way I was going to get out of this one gracefully was to admit my defeat.

"You're right," I began, loud enough to cut through the still chuckling din. It immediately fell to silence. "Relena Peacecraft, once Queen of the Earth, can't handle a silly little ghost story or two. It's true. You got me." I stood and raised my cider mug in a salute.

The silence prevailed for only a few more seconds and then, as I was predicting, Duo hopped up, grinned at me from across the flames and chimed in. "Aw. We can't harass you if you're going to go all formal on us."

"Oh, you can't, can't you?" I returned the grin.

"Well, not really."

"What made you think you could get away with it in the first place?"

He held up a finger. "That's simple. It was your turn."

Okay, he just lost me. "Pardon?"

"It was your turn," Heero repeated Duo, not bothering to rise from his seat on the log. He looked up at me through untrimmed bangs with an expression in his eyes that I could only categorize as a mix of irritation and humor. "The story I told, the one about the demon, he told me that one three years ago. I had nightmares for a week."

If I hadn't learned to maintain my composure, I'm sure my jaw would have fallen off. "You did not."

He smiled and nodded to Duo. "I did. The ass convinced me that it really happened. He had me jumping at shadows for a month and I swear anytime I heard any sort of scritching or scratching sounds my heart skipped a beat. Trowa was his second victim."

The man in question gave a sort of half-smile. "The mummy thing wouldn't have gotten me alone, but with the way Duo got Heero to recount the 'absolutely true' story about the demon, I'll admit, it had me a bit spooked. And then a few months later, I had a mission with Quatre and we ran into these two," he indicated Duo and Heero, "And Duo decided on victim number three."

No way. There was no way Duo managed to scare _Quatre_ with some silly stories. It was _Quatre_! He was an empath! He _had_ to know they were lying. I looked to my left and Quatre sighed. "It's true," he admitted. He put up a hand. "I know. I know. How did they trick me? I don't know either, but they just all seemed so _sincere_ and we _were_ in the ruins of the Countess de Lancre's castle at the time, I'm afraid I avoided all mirrors for the duration and convinced myself that I could feel the Countess' agony. It was really quite pathetic."

Wow. "So, let me guess, Wufei was next?"

"Actually, that was me," Dorothy piped in. "Last October, I got an invite similar to yours this evening. I knew the stories were just stories, but when it was time to make my way home, I couldn't make it on my own."

"She insisted that we _all_ walk her home," provided Duo. "Wouldn't take 'no' for an answer."

Dorothy was the toughest woman I knew and the idea that she needed four men to walk her home because she was scared was ludicrous. If it hadn't come from her own mouth, I would have called out Duo for lying. "And what about Wufei?" Now, I was curious.

"Wuffers was a hard sell," admitted Duo. "I figured he would be, so I didn't bother getting everyone together to scare him, I just brought in my secret weapon."

"Secret weapon?"

Wufei finally looked up. "If Quatre came to you and told you a story about the tragic death of a Countess and her suffering in the afterlife, would you have doubted him?"

He had a point. Quatre could tell you your hair turned purple and your butt sprouted roses and you simply would be unable to disbelieve. He was that convincing.

Right, so _everyone_ had gotten the crap scared out of them by Duo; it wasn't just me. I focused back on Duo. "Why would you do this kind of thing to your friends?"

"Show of hands," he started, flashing the biggest grin I'd seen from him all night, "Who had fun scaring Relena?"

Everyone raised an arm. "Show of hands," he continued, staring directly into my eyes, "Who wants to help me scare some other poor sap next year and perhaps get away from a giant mansion, hundreds of her bodyguards and just forget about everything she's worried about for a couple of days?"

I felt my hand reach up.

His grin turned a bit more sinister. "Any ideas on who that poor sap should be?"

My own lips joined his, in an imitation of a Jack-o-Lantern smile. "I think I need to pay my brother a visit about this time next year."

"Lena, that's a perfect idea."

-End-


End file.
